forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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