we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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