Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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