we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
