you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
