God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I want a musical about memes.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
