You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I just gift wrapped bread.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
