4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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