John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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