i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
only you would photoshop your dick
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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