She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
