Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems

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(210): View more from Texas

she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice

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(310): View more from California

A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.

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(217): View more from Illinois

Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up

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(916): View more from California

Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.

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(516): View more from New York

My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store

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(940): View more from Texas

thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.

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