There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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