so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
