Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
He passed out mid-signature
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
