I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
