just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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