I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
