I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm too high and old for this...
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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