Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
