see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Randomize
