NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
