I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
