So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
