your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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