i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
