using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
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