This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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