she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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