Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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