Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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