I want to have your abortion
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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