I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
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