i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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