Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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