I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
