A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
