I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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