So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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