I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
