Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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