Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
