I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
