Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
