# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Less talking, more tequila
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Randomize
