I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
i've created a new STD.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Randomize
