At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
