We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
