***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize
