is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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